A Lil Too Not Over You.

Night's surge of thoughts and memories kept me restless and awake everytime i lay on my bed.

Day's radiance drained my life as it kept me looking up at the sun, looking back at those days.. those wonderful memories..

Living in a daydream, struggling in a nightmare.



it took a long time to figure out, and it needed someone to phrase in its exact way, to understand this simple truth.

that the reason was not the situations, nor the actions, but me. who i really am.

fire is never meant for water.

prey is never meant for a predator.

white is never meant for black.

light is never meant for darkness.



inasmuch thoughts of madness and nonsensical logics i've cleared from my mind, my heart is still burning.

burning with a persistence that is pressing against my head,

saying "yes" while my head says "no",

thinking about memories and dreams while i'm being relentlessly reminded about reality.

truth hits so hard, an invincible blade that is immune to my retaliations of denial and flames of acceptance.

why can't i just get it in this time?

like how i'd been able too?



lost, can't seem to find a way out.

numb, from the grave chill.



untouchable, the gap of indifference brings.

the curse of the silent never negated,

a yearning for a rest on dependence unfulfilled,

unbearable pain standing on my own two feet continuously.



resolutions stand like judges in front of me,

whispering to me to go on,

even when sight is lost,

even when hopes are dashed,

even when faith fades,

when my spirit dies.



waiting for a conversation,

not to spill my sorrows, neither to blame,

but to share a wish,

a wish that i can only share with you.



while the awaiting future doesn't really matter for now,

gotta do what i must one at a time.