Tattoo.
*Names have been pseudo-ed for confidentiality.
Coincidence brought my long lost friend back again. I met Edison on the train as i was out; both of us were on our way to church. though i was very much happy to see him, we couldn't talk much for he had to alight at the next stop after the one which i just boarded.
Truly coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous. something was troubling him deep down inside. i could see it in his eyes. i didn't know what to say to him for several days until tonight.
He read my Apr 13 post. and i could just sync myself with him almost completely.
Edison. a superbly nice guy, who loves his buddy very much. Despite the changes, distance and busyness of life, he's always trying his best to love unconditionally, to give to her everything he could possibly offer. He's doing everything he can to keep things the way it has used to be. yea. used to be.
Edison's wearing out. this love is just consuming him. tired, vexed, confused, and the worst battle ever - the internal war between giving up and giving more, selfishness and selflessness, self-protection and self-sacrifice. but all he gets is indifferent responses, ignorance, the cold shoulder. yea we're talking about unconditional love yes, but seeing this situation i cannot deny the fact that it hurts so much more to fight against the selfish thoughts of anger and frustration. feels like pressing my heart against a bed of spikes.
Japheth has new friends in her new school now. very nice friends. i guess she would've realised by now that she is drifting away from Edison very quickly; maybe she doesn't feel the same way as how Edison felt towards her in the first place. she's just too busy for him. the truth of the matter is, Edison loves her more than the other way round.
It happens. i guess that's just life is it?
But we have to understand that her ice-cold, or possibly even negative responses, are probably unintentional. i only say this because my pal has been very honest with me. i truly appreciate it.
she feels so disgraceful, so sorry, for Edison, because she doesn't even feel this "buddy" way.
Sigh. is this the end of the few years of camaraderie?
Shouldn't Edison and i be super good buddies, since we have such similarities?
Immediately an answer came, saying that if we were to be good buddies, we won't even be talking like this, about this today. We're very much similar in personality and stuff, but i believe we are meant for different people? purposed to be someone's pillar of strength, the living proof of God's goodness and greatness in their lives?
People have told us to give up. not to do anything anymore. just care for yourself. but Edison and i just can't.
If you, Japheth, ever get to read my blog, would you take some time off, quickly settle the other issues of life, and think about what you want to do about this? i know he definitely means something to you, and it's just that it's different from the new people you have in your life; it could be flow, chemistry and personality matches. but what position do you want him to stand in your life? it's not going to be an easy answer, because there is so much to consider, to think about. you've got more homework, extra stuff here and there, more new friends to integrate and know better, but the same 24 hours. the same amount of money. time ain't gonna extend itself, neither is money gonna multiply in your wallet.
to expand one's capacity is not easy. not easy at all. yes it's really great to have someone who loves you so much, though you don't feel exactly as much or the same as him, but it's also very nice to have found mutual bonds, somehow bringing out a more natural flow.
i don't know entirely how you feel about this, but Edison means what he says. he unconditionally loves, and doesn't demand anything back. no matter what the outcome is gonna be, his heart lies a mark, a tattoo of your name on it. no matter how far you go, his heart will always have room for you. He is a very strong person trust me, but if God had placed both of you together in the first place, i pray that this bond will be blessed till eternity.
two buddies, going through different tough times, but having to learn the same thing - expanding our capacity and being strong-willed.
Daddy God, i pray that as soon as the hustling clouds fade away, restoration will blossom once again. yes, when much is given, much is required, but let both persons be willing to walk the second mile, and embrace the bitter-sweet taste of Your love once again. God bless Edison and Japheth.
dear pal, thanks for sharing with me what you've been going through all this while. be it the good times or the bad. without understanding you i will never have the courage or strength to fight against the temptation of self-centredness, even to have a clearer picture of what you're facing.
the wait is long, unbearable at times, but i thank God for patience. i'll wait for you, for i believe and trust in you. i'm praying for strength, wisdom and love to be upon you everyday, that you may do the ordained and necessary things without burning out. i pray that your relationships in your family, with your bros and friends will go no lower but only better, managing it with tactfulness, balance, but most importantly love. i thank God for you once again, because you helped my friend in this period of tough times. Thank you.
in Jesus' name i pray, Amen.
Life - Love = 0
Coincidence brought my long lost friend back again. I met Edison on the train as i was out; both of us were on our way to church. though i was very much happy to see him, we couldn't talk much for he had to alight at the next stop after the one which i just boarded.
Truly coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous. something was troubling him deep down inside. i could see it in his eyes. i didn't know what to say to him for several days until tonight.
He read my Apr 13 post. and i could just sync myself with him almost completely.
Edison. a superbly nice guy, who loves his buddy very much. Despite the changes, distance and busyness of life, he's always trying his best to love unconditionally, to give to her everything he could possibly offer. He's doing everything he can to keep things the way it has used to be. yea. used to be.
Edison's wearing out. this love is just consuming him. tired, vexed, confused, and the worst battle ever - the internal war between giving up and giving more, selfishness and selflessness, self-protection and self-sacrifice. but all he gets is indifferent responses, ignorance, the cold shoulder. yea we're talking about unconditional love yes, but seeing this situation i cannot deny the fact that it hurts so much more to fight against the selfish thoughts of anger and frustration. feels like pressing my heart against a bed of spikes.
Japheth has new friends in her new school now. very nice friends. i guess she would've realised by now that she is drifting away from Edison very quickly; maybe she doesn't feel the same way as how Edison felt towards her in the first place. she's just too busy for him. the truth of the matter is, Edison loves her more than the other way round.
It happens. i guess that's just life is it?
But we have to understand that her ice-cold, or possibly even negative responses, are probably unintentional. i only say this because my pal has been very honest with me. i truly appreciate it.
she feels so disgraceful, so sorry, for Edison, because she doesn't even feel this "buddy" way.
Sigh. is this the end of the few years of camaraderie?
Shouldn't Edison and i be super good buddies, since we have such similarities?
Immediately an answer came, saying that if we were to be good buddies, we won't even be talking like this, about this today. We're very much similar in personality and stuff, but i believe we are meant for different people? purposed to be someone's pillar of strength, the living proof of God's goodness and greatness in their lives?
People have told us to give up. not to do anything anymore. just care for yourself. but Edison and i just can't.
If you, Japheth, ever get to read my blog, would you take some time off, quickly settle the other issues of life, and think about what you want to do about this? i know he definitely means something to you, and it's just that it's different from the new people you have in your life; it could be flow, chemistry and personality matches. but what position do you want him to stand in your life? it's not going to be an easy answer, because there is so much to consider, to think about. you've got more homework, extra stuff here and there, more new friends to integrate and know better, but the same 24 hours. the same amount of money. time ain't gonna extend itself, neither is money gonna multiply in your wallet.
to expand one's capacity is not easy. not easy at all. yes it's really great to have someone who loves you so much, though you don't feel exactly as much or the same as him, but it's also very nice to have found mutual bonds, somehow bringing out a more natural flow.
can you have the best of both sides you ask?
i think the question should be: "do you want the best of both sides?" it's not a matter of selfishness. either way you'll be saying that you want something, so yea. are you able to strike a balance between all your friends and Edison? Apart from the fun and joy, do you still want to keep the one who brings you guidance and peace serene?
one thing is for sure. if you truly love, you would commit. it's really more than just maintaining a connection. As to what extent, the heart shall reveal itself once again.
i don't know entirely how you feel about this, but Edison means what he says. he unconditionally loves, and doesn't demand anything back. no matter what the outcome is gonna be, his heart lies a mark, a tattoo of your name on it. no matter how far you go, his heart will always have room for you. He is a very strong person trust me, but if God had placed both of you together in the first place, i pray that this bond will be blessed till eternity.
two buddies, going through different tough times, but having to learn the same thing - expanding our capacity and being strong-willed.
Daddy God, i pray that as soon as the hustling clouds fade away, restoration will blossom once again. yes, when much is given, much is required, but let both persons be willing to walk the second mile, and embrace the bitter-sweet taste of Your love once again. God bless Edison and Japheth.
dear pal, thanks for sharing with me what you've been going through all this while. be it the good times or the bad. without understanding you i will never have the courage or strength to fight against the temptation of self-centredness, even to have a clearer picture of what you're facing.
the wait is long, unbearable at times, but i thank God for patience. i'll wait for you, for i believe and trust in you. i'm praying for strength, wisdom and love to be upon you everyday, that you may do the ordained and necessary things without burning out. i pray that your relationships in your family, with your bros and friends will go no lower but only better, managing it with tactfulness, balance, but most importantly love. i thank God for you once again, because you helped my friend in this period of tough times. Thank you.
in Jesus' name i pray, Amen.
Life - Love = 0
posted by †LeNoir™† at
10:22 PM
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